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Stay Little, My Little Love

I have a son who will be 4 in May. It’s hard to wrap my mind around this fact because as the saying goes, “it seems like just yesterday we were bringing him home”. I know because of his impending birthday, I’m becoming more sentimental and can easily begin crying as I lovingly gaze at him going about his day. It happens every year around this time and by now my husband isn’t surprised when it does. 

Each day I accomplish the seemingly impossible task of loving him even more than the previous one. He’s hilarious, adventurous, sweet, imaginative, musical, thoughtful, and so many other wonderful things that continually amaze me. 

Right now his world revolves around me, his Daddy, his 6 month old brother, dinosaurs, robots, reading his favorite stories, showing off his strength and athleticism, and enjoying the outdoors every chance he gets. 

His nightly ritual consists of reading a bedtime story with his Daddy as I am typically occupied with getting baby brother to bed. He likes to hold his beloved Bunny as he sleeps and gently tucks his Bumblebee Transformer car into a blanket next to him. 

Tonight he was upset as he got ready to listen to his story and realized Bumblebee was not next to him as per usual. I had just left the baby’s room when he approached me noticeably distraught over “losing my Bumblebee”. We teamed up and searched for a few minutes and without a Bumblebee in sight, I explained he may have to sleep without him tonight. He accepted this reality, although voicing that it would make him sad-understandably so. I decided to do one last sweep downstairs and happily discovered the yellow and black racing striped Camaro. 

When I entered his room and presented the lost car to him, he was ecstatic and thanked me profusely. He gave me the warmest hug and professed that I was “the bestest Momma in the whole world and Earth”. I held him tightly as he wrapped his arms around me. 

In that moment I thought to myself, “I wish I could fix all of his problems this easily.” And then a sad truth crept in. I knew I wouldn’t always be able to come to his aid and remedy his troubles. 

A lost Bumblebee is a big dilemma in the small world of my little boy. But one day, he’ll likely be faced with much more complex problems in an incredibly larger world. Problems that cannot be readily resolved with a simple search and find mission.

I know that day is coming and I pray for its’ slow arrival. Although, honestly, I know I’m fighting a losing battle. Time is flying by and all I can do is try my best to hold onto these moments and memories-to hold onto my incredible little boy who hugs his bestest Momma for solving the big problems in his small, yet beautiful world. 

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